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Facing My Greatest Fear

October 21, 2015 By Kat

Public speaking is a gig I just LOVE to do. Probably because I like to talk a lot & sometimes it’s hard to shut me up. I chose to teach a style of yoga that is purely verbal. How great it that! I get paid to talk for 90 minutes plus all the extra time before & after class geeking out on yoga chat.

Public speaking isn’t without its challenges though. It’s easy to hide behind a comfortable learned dialogue. When I’m presenting unscripted on ‘woo woo’ subjects the nerves appear.

Fear shows up in my head:

Will I be accepted?
I might get booed off stage.
They’ll think I’m crazy or not knowledgeable enough.
What happens if I go completely blank?

All these thoughts rush through my head before speaking events. It’s natural. Nerves show up when we haven’t done things before or in new situations. Even now after teaching hundreds of yoga classes if I teach at a new studio I still get nervous. The flutter in my stomach shows I care – positive resistance shows I’m on the right track. If I didn’t care I probably wouldn’t get jitters & it would be time to move direction.

It all comes down to TRUST.

Trusting fully the Universe & spirit has my back calms me down.

Trusting that what comes through & out my mouth is exactly what needed in that moment.

Trusting everyone in attendance will get something out of it, even if they don’t realize it.

Surrendering & just let it flows.

However my greatest fear around speaking out loud is yet to be revealed.

It’s not the nerves I fear the most about public speaking it’s being RECORDED.

How cringe worthy hey to hear your voice back?

“Do I really sound like that?”

Doesn’t our own voice sound weird to how we hear it live in the moment?

Hence I have NEVER recorded myself at a public event.

I’ve side stepped many requests to record guided meditations, video’s & workshops for online access.

I’d rather spend hours writing & editing words than be recorded. My distance healing sessions would be far more economical on my time if I voice recorded them but no I’m super comfortable writing thanks.

Time to get over this fear. It’s holding me back from moving forward & getting my work out there on a greater scale.

The biggest push I’ve felt recently is that I need to start recording my live channeling work.

For those who don’t know what channeling is it’s basically connecting to the universal guidance. Either your own inner voice (Soul) and/or other high vibration energy that transmit messages through a physical being like myself so they can be heard. Channeling can take on different forms; writing, speaking, art, dance or music & much more.

The ‘intuitive reading’ part of my healing sessions is actually ‘channeled guidance.’ The information I pass onto my clients flows through me from a greater vibrational source or from the clients’ higher self. I don’t try to understand or figure out what I’m being told or shown I just relay it the best I can on ‘human terms’ so it can be understood. It’s not coming from me, it’s coming from ‘Source.’

Recently I discovered in my own healing session there is a collective energy wishing to speak through me. Don’t freak out. When I channel guidance I am fully in control I’m still driving the bus & I can stop any time. Channeling is SAFE or I wouldn’t be doing it. It does not possess or take over. Yes there are some channels out there that go into a total trance. This is not what I do. For me I am in a deeply relaxed meditative state in which I am still aware, just like when I facilitate a healing session. The energy & I work together, that is why it is called a collective energy. I am part of the collective, the ‘physical’ vessel on earth.

Channeling is still new to me, especially speaking out loud whilst connected. (Side note: I heard my guides laughing at me here. I’ve been channeling without realizing I think for longer than I give myself credit) Even in healing sessions I rarely speak out during the session I wait till the end then relay messages. Up to this point I’ve never channeled a collective, it’s always been universal. Check out Lee Harris who is an awesome channel who’s collective are called The Z’s.

I’m finally acknowledging it is time for the collective voice to be heard. (To date they have not given me their names yet that is how new this is.) It’s time to take what I do to the next level for the greatest of good. Therefore it would be more beneficial to record my channeling sessions.

Oh my – record myself speaking & publish it online. Freak out!!

Now I’ll share with you what I find highly amusing in my tale.

I’m freaking out about the sound of my voice when it’s recorded yes?
Not freaking out at all that the words I am speaking are not my own and are literally filtering through me from some invisible group energy that is not of our planet?
Because that would be something to freak out about right?
Won’t people think I’m totally nuts for doing this?

No I’m super relaxed about the guidance I channel, as I trust it is what needs to be heard for maximum healing. I’m just not relaxed about recording the whole thing & listening back.

Another important reason I need to get comfortable with recording is when I channel I forget what has been said. Yes I am in control but I do surrender my thinking brain to some degree. The words come out, I speak & once I disconnect often I don’t remember all of what came through. Even more reason to record it!! There will be guidance in there for me too I need to hear.

The messages are clear!

I did try one more avoidance technique before I gave in. Dictation software – this translates voice to text. It seemed like my perfect solution. Then I could just copy & paste the dictated words into my blog or where ever. Deep down I knew, felt & heard when I tried this:

“it has to be recorded.”

Hence my cheat’s way failed. The written text was choppy, illiterate at times & just didn’t translate. There was no way I could edit it, as I couldn’t recall the whole channel.

Okay, I get it I surrender to what has to be. It’s time to get over this fear. Now I’ve opened up about this in public I’m holding myself responsible to do it. The words of the collective are here to be heard & I must honour that. Watch or listen out on this space for more…

Big Love,

In the moment, a walk in my thoughts

March 18, 2015 By Kat

Writing brings me such joy. It’s my outlet for creative expression as well as a way of processing & understanding what is going on in my life. Two years ago I was writing blog posts at least four days a week, now I struggle to get one out a month. Acknowledged I need to make more time for my passions. However as I’ve learned with creative pursuits sometimes it’s darn tricky to get the juices flowing. Especially on the days I have so much time to write the words just don’t come.

This happened to me on Friday night. A whole evening to myself & I had writers block. I’d started a post earlier in the week but on reading back the first draft it all felt wrong. It was struggle town to edit & remold what I’d started. Stepping away from the computer keyboard I hit the couch & just lay there reading.

That’s when the magic started to happen. I grabbed my notebook & pen & just started to write, freely & intuitively. Here’s the result a jumble, mismatch of creativity, simple, raw & ‘different.’ Truly being in the moment & tuning into my awareness. Could this be a new way of writing? Or an experiment in surrendering, letting go & seeing what happens…

A walk in my thoughts

Rain falling on the tin roof. Soothing pitter-patter of nature drop by drop.

The smell of patchouli incense mixed with the healthful food cooking in the oven.

Sipping sparkling water.

Easing a sore shoulder with a warming wheat pack.

Reviewing the day – smile – gratitude.

A solo yoga class all by myself, for myself. Pleasure, joy & stillness.

Connecting with like-minded people. Time with friends.

Parcel in the post a welcome surprise.

The warm glow of the salt lamp.

Looking for a deep & meaningful angle to write about. Overthinking – the curse of the creative mind. Grabbing a notebook & letting it flow. Freely with ease.

More automatic writing. Channeling messages in words.

{Idea sparked} Excitement.

Inspiration, new ideas, where to go & what to do next with it.

Learning to sit still & do nothing – stillness brings inner knowing outward.

Read a book, leaf through a magazine. Being human, not constantly searching but still experiencing.

Hot tea & cold chocolate.

Crisp clean sheet & a deep sinking pillow. Rest.

There it is, a spew of words on a page (Grammar check was having a ball!). A record of being fully present in the moment. This post was quick, to the point & hardly needed any editing. I’m not sure what this means completely but I have a few ideas of where to go from here.

Till soon, with love K xx

A Tea Making Meditation

January 14, 2015 By Kat

Meditation can take on many different forms. It does not necessarily require you to sit in lotus position, chanting mantras for six hours day, but this is an option if you so desire. Meditation is what you make it to be & it’s a personal choice. Go with what works best for you. The aim simply is to relax your mind & bring conscious awareness to your being.

Back when I was working full time the only way I got my ten minute snippets of mind stillness was during my morning/afternoon walk to the station & funnily enough sat on the train. Yes meditation can be moving & open eyed. Or again it can be still, eyes closed & in solitude. The goal is to bring your focus within, still the mind & connect with your heart (or Soul). I admit my original way did not bring as deeper connection as it does now with the latter method. There is a lot of distractions when meditating in public, even plugged into an iPod! Better than nothing though.

A few months ago I was having a lovely chat with a friend about a totally different process of meditation, the ritual of making a cup of tea. Sounds totally bonkers right? But no wait hear me out. A meditation practice is about being consciously aware. It does not matter what you are actually physically doing. As long as you are conscious of your actions & aware of every little thing you do. Taking you out of your busy head & bring you into inner peace.

Here’s how the tea comes in.

Every morning the first thing I do is make a cup of my favourite Yorkshire tea. Before anything else tea comes first. Upon rising my mind is still & body refreshed from sleep. This is the best time for a meditative ritual as the busy thoughts have yet to start processing.

It’s quite easy to do a tea making meditation. Firstly it’s important to pay close attention to every part of the process. Don’t just fumble round the kitchen grabbing the first cup you find & mindlessly fill the kettle.

Here, I’ll walk you through the process I use.

Come to place of stillness in your kitchen ready to start. Take a few deep; long, slow breathes right into your belly. You may close your eyes if you wish.

Once you feel centred move your focus to the kettle. If it needs filling with water move slowly to grasp the handle staying very conscious of every move you make. Note how the kettle feels in your hand. Is it cold, smooth; does the kettle feel heavy to lift? Carefully fill the kettle. Listen to the noise of the water rushing hitting the metal sides, the swooshing from the tap and maybe the gentle bang from the pipes.

Return the kettle to its stand or the stovetop & turn it on to boil. Stand back & note how the kettle comes to life. Watch the light flick on, the noise of the element clicking in or the gas flames hissing.

Whilst the kettle is boiling take your time selecting a cup & teapot if you use one. If you usually just grab the first clean cup you come across, stop & pay attention to all the cups on the shelf. Examine their sizes, colours, patterns, material and shapes & notice the sounds they make when they chink together. Really see & feel what is in front of you. (It’s surprising what you find lurking in the cupboard when you really look, you may unearth an old favourite)

Now for the tea! Take your time selecting which tea you would like to start your day with. Let you gaze linger over the boxes or caddies, pick them up, read the label, note the design & colours. Which is singing out to you today? It might not even be tea at all, hot water & lemon is always a good start. If so carefully select a lemon to cut up, avoid just grabbing the first one you lay your hand on. Hold the lemon, feel the texture of its skin, the vibrancy of the colour, its shape & size.

With the same conscious awareness place you tea in your selected cup or teapot. Pay attention to how the bag feels in your fingers; look at the shape & the colour of the leaves inside. If you use loose leaf, measure out the scoop & carefully place it in the diffuser. Keep breathing deeply allowing the aroma of the tea to fill your nostrils.

Bring your awareness to your ears. Listen to the sounds all around you, the clink of the teaspoons, the boiling of the kettle, and any outside noises from nature. How are you feeling right now? Take note of your state of being, how relaxed you are & aware of your whole body & connected to your senses. Tune into any messages that come through from your inner knowing. Now is the perfect time to receive some wisdom. Quietly ask your heart “is there anything I need to know for today please?”

Once the water has boiled very carefully & slowly pour the water over your tea or lemon. Being completely aware of the sounds & smells all around you. Feel the heat from the steam warm your hand. Look at the colour of the water change as the tea steeps & infusers. Take a few very deep breaths & really be apart of the process as your tea is brewing.

Here’s the best bit, the drinking! Sit in your favourite chair or spot outside. Hold your teacup between both hands, feel the heat warm your palms. Get totally involved by bringing the cup to your nose breathing deeply the scent, feel the steam waft over your face. Now drink. Savouring the flavour, the heat in your mouth and the warm glow in your stomach. Give gratitude for receiving such a sacred experience & the nourishment to not only your body but also your Soul.

Give this tea meditation a try & see how being fully conscious in the process heightens your awareness & connection to your Soul. Let me know how you get on in the comments below.

With love, K xx

Oracle Card Reading Workshop

April 16, 2014 By Kat

One of my many metaphysical past times & passions is giving oracle card readings. Even if you’ve never heard of oracle cards or you might own a couple of decks yourself. Today’s post is for everybody, as I’ll tell you a bit more about oracle cards. I’ve written a previous post here about the Angel Therapy oracle cards I use. That’s how much I like oracle cards!!

If you’re not too sure what oracle cards are here is a brief run down. Oracle cards have been around for centuries & are a form of divination tool. They can assist us in tapping into the divine guidance of the universe to bring clarity to our lives. Often we get caught up in our own heads & can’t hear our inner guides talking to us. Oracle cards work with the law of attraction. Thus what we need to know is drawn to us on an energetic level through the cards we select. They are 100% safe, gentle & easy to use. Nothing sinister or ‘dark’ is involved. Just use the intention of pure love for the greater good & you’ll be fine. Oracle cards are one of my favourite ways to receive extra guidance when I need it.

There are many different types of card decks out there. I am drawn to those themed around Angels, Elemental’s & spirit guide animals. Use your own intuition to guide your choice as to which deck your select to work with. Decks can be combined too if you can’t make up your mind. Just visit your local new age shop or browse popular sites like Amazon, Book Depository or Fishpond.

Just like the decks there are a variety of ways to conduct a reading with different card spreads. Again it depends on the guidance you wish to receive as to how many cards & which layout you select. Spreads range of a single card to a full ten-card life journey spreads.

Surrendering & trusting that the messages I receive from a card reading are exactly what I need is very important. Any fear can get in the way & block the energy flow. Attracting more fear & confusion. Staying open & focused on love & pure intention is all that is needed.

However oracle cards do not give you the magic answer to all your problems. They can assist in clearing the confusion & get your creative juices flowing. More often than not once the cards are drawn I can relate to their messages instantly. How I interpret the messages is up to me though. Even when the same card is drawn over & over depending on the situation in question it may carry a different meaning. This is how you learn to use your own inner knowledge bank aka your intuition.

My interest in oracle card reading lead me to take the Advanced Angel Tarot & Oracle card reading course with Doreen Virtue & Radleigh Valentine. The course was truly fascinating. It went far deeper into interpreting the messages & symbolism in the cards. They aren’t just covered in pretty pictures; there are meanings to be had in the artwork. Tarot reading is quite complex; it would take a lot more than a short blog post to explain.

That is why I’m running a one day workshop all about oracle & tarot cards. I invite you all to join me for this exciting opportunity on Sunday 4th May 2014. A full day to immerse a group of like-minded people with everything I’ve learned & know on the subject. We’ll be going into depth about how cards work, different decks & spreads & learning how to give a reading. My aim is to assist you all to feel comfortable enough & trusting your own intuition to give readings. I hope to send you all home with a new skill & confidence that you are all more than capable to use oracle cards in your everyday life. Above all FUN is on top of the agenda!

If you are in Perth & would like to join in the workshop please see the flyer below for details or fill in the contact form. No experience necessary & card decks will be provided to use on the day. Bring a friend for half price too! You both pay just $75 each a saving of $25.

With love, Kat xx

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